Insanity
by Dierdra
Summary: Read and you'll find out. Plz review honestly. Read im sure you'll like it.
1. Insanity

INSANITY

Disclaimer- I do not own Hellsing's characters or this world though I wish I did, but for now I'll use them to my own sick devises. All new characters are mine. All the original characters are mine.

The door gave a chilling creak as it was pushed open. The blinding light came from the outside room and invaded my dark one. It hurt my eyes so I had to close them. Why is everything so bright out there?

"Get up now!" A harsh voice demanded.

The voices always change. They're never the same. Always trying to keep me isolated. Don't let me get familiar. Keep me alone. I'm so alone. I hate being alone. Its so boring, and dull.

"I said get up you little wretch! It's time to go down to he lab."

I wont get up. I still have my pride left. Whatever that means, but I won't get up they just want to hurt me. Maybe I can play a game with him. He sounds fun to play with.

"Make me move old man. Lets see if you can. You smell. Just like the others that fell."

"Get up do as I say!"

OOOO he gets angry fast. I will enjoy this.

"NO!"

"Fine have it your way. I'll take you there by force."

"See if you can."

His footsteps are heavy as he starts to slowly stalk towards me. He is a foolish man. Never bite what you can't chew. I remember hearing that once. Yes that fits in his case. I let a smirk I had been holding in grace my lips. Unfolding my self from my position on the floor I stood up. He got within 2 feet of me then he shot his hand out to grab my arm. I used my superior speed, and moved behind him. He looked startled. He hasn't noticed i'm behind him yet.

"Back here. Do not fear."

"What how did you do that. What are you some kind of FREAK!"

"Your to slow old man. Come on catch me if you can. I'll give you one chance old man. To hit me if you can, but if you fail I'll beat you like the hammer to the nail."

"Stop rhyming it's annoying as hell."

He's fun to play with. He gets angrier than all the others so much faster. Lets see how much I can make him squirm.

"Rhyming is just a part of my game. Come on, come on see if you can play my game."

He just growled at me. How very interesting. It was a deep rumbling sound. I wonder what other noises I can make him make, but growling not nice all I want to do is play with him. I'm so very bored in this dank dark room.

"Hit me now before I leave, or else you'll know what I have up my sleeve."

"You're crazy you're stark raving mad. Get the hell away from me."

That's really not nice. I'm giving him the chance to win, and he insults me. He's made me mad.

"You've made me mad. Oh you won't be glad."

The concrete wall shuttered with the force that I slammed this fat, old, man against it.

"The game is done you've ruined my fun. The turn is mine. You're outta time."

Grabbing his neck I started to squeeze. The harder I squeezed the purpler he got. Laughing I squeezed harder. I want to see how purple he can get. He sounds like a chicken the way he's clucking. I can hear his heart beating in his chest. It's lost its rhythm. It beats faster faster.

"Let…me…go…please."

His voice was barley a whisper, and came out as mostly gasps for breath, but I heard him.

"Give me a reason why."

"They'll…hurt…you."

He's wasting his precious breath on this. What a waste. He's not worth my time. He's lost my interest.

"They already do"

With that said I dropped him to the ground. AAWWW it looks like he's bowing to me. How cute. I love that look on his face like I'm actually going to let him go. No can't do that.This is boring. He had his chance to live, but he refused. How rude of him. I let my glorious nails grow into long, sharp, points.

"This was fun when it began, but I'm bored once again. Your time is through. I wont miss you."

My nails slashed through his throat with easy. Like ripping tissue paper. His eyes widened for a moment then he fell forward. Never to breathe again. His neck poured blood into a small pool at my feet. Some people say the smell of blood is disgusting, but I rather enjoy the smell. It's a very unique scent, but enjoyable all the same. I've never tasted blood, but I' tempted to find out if it tastes as good as it smells. I just kind of stared at the pool. Something in me was changing. It wants the blood. It craves it needs it. Carefully I got on my knees not caring that I was kneeling in the blood. My hand as if by its own violation reached for the blood. The sticky liquid is still warm. It dripped all over me as I brought it back to my mouth. Hesitantly I brought my tongue out. The first taste was heavanly. It was sweet, and tart at the same time. With a hint of spice thrown into the mix. I want more. I want it all. I attacked the liquid with a new vigor. The rags I call clothes were drenched a splashed with blood. My face is smeared with blood around my mouth.

"Hehehehe this is cool."

The blood is gone. I ate it all. Now I'm sad. I'm all alone again. The door was smashed open, and the funny looking men came pilling in. Then came Craig. I don't like Craig. Craig makes me mad.

"Quick hold her down"

Uh-oh it sounds like i'm in trouble. Today's not going to be a good day. No no, no, never a good day in this place. This place of blinding light, and stark white walls. They keep saying their going to make me better always better. I don't see what's wrong with me. I think I'm fine. Maybe they're the ones that need to be made better, but of course it's always the imperfect ones that think their perfect. Slowly I got up. I am not so dumb as to make quick movements. It makes them nervous then they do rash things, and make me bad. There was a contagious silence. Frankly I don't know why. They were all staring at me like I was some demon from the underworld.

"Dear god girl what have you done. What have you done"?

What does he mean? OOHH! He means mister cranky pants on the floor. Whys he's so surprised. I'm only doing what they want me to do they're making me this way.

"She's doing exactly what we want her to Craig. So get her down to the lab NOW so we can make her even better. Today's a special day for my special girl. You're going to make me very proud today i'm sure."

"You heard the Dr. get this thing down too the lab."

Proud, I can make Dr proud. That's all I want to do. He's such a nice man. He doesn't make me mad. I only want to make him happy and proud. Here come the funny looking men. I tried to cover my mouth before I started laughing out loud, but the funny looking men were mean and held my arms tightly in place as they dragged me out of the room. I couldn't hold it back I just started laughing. I like to laugh, but everyone looks at me weird when I laugh. Craig was giving me a nasty look. I don't like Craig so I hissed at him on my way past him. He jumped back like a scarred dog. His face is funny. His Nose is HUGE! I want to poke it, but then I would get in trouble. His nose popped in my head again, and I imagined a small civilization of people marooned on it. I laughed all the way out the door and down the hall.

I remember this hall. I don't like this hall. Bad things happen to me when I go down this hall. NO, NO, NO I don't want to go.

"NO! Let me go! I don't want to go let me go let me go!"

Struggling against the funny men I tried to get away. Anywhere, but here.

"Adrielle stop that this instant! Behave or else ill have to punish you, and you don't want that."

"I don't care Dr I don't want to go. I wont go. You're making me mad. Stop making me mad.

Dr used my name that's never good, but I don't want to go. The bad things are down this hall. I struggled harder and managed to turn and start to run away, but the grabbed me before I could dart off. Dr made a look at Craig, and Craig Smiled. I don't like it when he smiles. It's always bad when he smiles. He reached in his white jacket, and pulled out he pointy thing I don't like. Renewing my struggles I tried to get away, but more funny men came to hold me down. They lifted my head and jerked it to the side. Craig came closer and closer with the pointy thing. He was filling it with something. It burns that stuff. It hurts.

"Hold her still god damn it. I can't inject it if she's thrashing around like that."

"I'm sorry sir but she's really strong."

Obviously I'm not that strong if I can't get these guys off me. I don't want that stuff in my neck again. Not again. I have to break free.

"I said hold her down or else you will face the consequences."

"Yes sir sorry sir"

Without warning more funny looking men jumped on me. Their weight was amazing. I think they're crushing spine. Great I'm going to die under a bunch of funny looking fat pigs. God damnit I can't move. These bastards are really making me mad.

"Good now keep her down while I inject this."

I can't move. No not again. I don't want this. Please no. A growl came from deep in my throat, and I got the satisfaction of seeing pure fear fly across Craig's face. As soon as it was there though it was gone, and he continued to advance on me. Finally he stood in front of me. My eyes flashed fire at him, and he briefly hesitated before driving the needle into my neck with brute force. Involuntarily a small scream passed my lips. Craig just smirked down at me as I felt the burn of the strange liquid start to spread across my body. Everywhere it burned my muscles relaxed.

"There now she shouldn't be a problem anymore."

The funny looking men got off of me, and my body slammed non-to gracefully to the floor. I can't move. I have no strength left.

"Get her in the lab now!"

I threw an apologetic look to Dr, but I only received a hateful glare instead. I felt my body being picked up and carried threw the doors. I hate these doors. They're evil doors. You can see the evil seeping room them.

"Lay her on the table, and hook her up."

No, Not again. The table was chillingly cold on my practically bare back. Looking around I noticed the funny men scurrying about. Some had bags with red stuff in them, and with long tubes and a needle attached. I hate those bags. I especially hat those needles.

"Get the machine hooked up, and hurry and get those blood bags set up."

My fingers started to twitch. Good I'm starting to get feeling back in my fingers. Then they'll all pay for making me mad. Suddenly hands grabbed mine harshly.

"Now, now, now can't have you getting away can we Adrielle."

Craig strapped me down to the table. There is no way I'd be able to break through the steel bonds. I really hate Craig. Suddenly the needles were shoved into my veins. I winced at the pain, but I refuse to make a sound. After they stopped shoving needles in me Craig started to warm up the 'machine'. Theirs no escapes this now. I looked at the bags labels. They all said the same thing. Cat, dog, wolf, leopard, dragon. The last, and biggest bag stopped me though. It said a name.

Alucard. Who's Alucard, and why is his blood about to be drained into my body.

"Night, night Adrielle."

I heard Craig flip the switch on the 'machine'. The Intense amount of pain caused me to fall into the vast darkness of my mind.


	2. my mind is my escape

The Cost of Perfection

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing or any of its characters. For now. One day I dare to dream that they shall be mine, but alas they shall not. That doesn't mean however that I can't use them to my own cruel devises. All original characters are mine though.

I'm flying. I'm high above the world. I'm safe and free. I don't have a care in the world.

"It's a lie. Open your eyes. See the world for what it really is. This is all a dream that shall never come to pass. For you their shall never be safety or freedom."

My eye lids slowly opened. I really don't want to see the world for what it really is. I want to live in my dream. A small gasp escaped my lips. Everything is different. I no longer feel safe. Everything is so dark. Black if you may. No, no, no not the dark again. Bad things happen in the dark. I don't like the dark the dark is bad.

"To bad you will forever more live in the darkness. Your life belongs in the dark. It is where you thrive, and grow. It is your domain. Listen to me, and I can make you great. With me you will have eternity, and power."

"Who are you? Where am I?"

EW… my voice sounds weak, and pathetic. I am none of those things, but I don't like the dark!

"At this time I am of no importance. As to where you are. You are in your mind, or rather trapped here for the time being. Think of it as a flight-or-fight reaction. This is your escape from the extreme physical pain your body is going through."

"You sound like a woman. Your voice has given that away. Who are you? What do you want?"

"Are you sure I'm a woman. Maybe I'm a man masking my voice as a woman's. Don't jump to quick conclusions. There are many ways to mask ones true identity. What I want is for you to learn. You are the first of your kind girl. A hybrid vampire. You are capable of so many things."

"Let me guess you want to be on my side. Since ill have all the power right."

"Of course. I am always out for personal gain, and so should you. Never let arrogance take you over. That is what gets you killed. Know this. Death is avoidable, but no one is void from it. Every one and everything can die. That is your first lesson from me."

"It's a good lesson I suppose. I have another question."

"Very well one more question, but our time here grows short. You will be waking up shortly."

"Why me? Is their something special about me and that's why they picked me, or was I the victim of circumstance? I can't remember who I was. What I was like. Hell I don't even remember what I fucking look like. I haven't seen my face in years. That name Adrielle that is not my name. It is what they gave me. So I also ask you. Who am I?"

"I cannot tell you who you were before all of this. It would not be my place. I will tell you that you will find out eventually. You could say you're special. Actually that is a very accurate word for it. You are the only one with the right genetics for this. It actually runs in your family, but you were the only viable candidate. When you were born you had a genetic abnormality. Basically it meant that your genes could be changed, and enhanced without the event of your death. Her majesty wants the perfect assassin, and that's were you come into the picture. Imagine the possibilities. A girl that you can manipulate into anything you want."

"So that's it. I'm just an experiment. A tool."

"Yes, but you are a successful experiment. Now let me finish what I was saying. The scientists hear have been taking the desired traits from animals, and inserting them into you for 7 years. Every one of the experiments was a success. You were fast, you were strong, and you were damn near invincible, but you still weren't perfect. Just recently though they came by a stroke of luck. The un-life kings blood. Alucard is what he calls himself now, but that is not his name. His name is Arucard. Anyways his blood as filled in all those nasty imperfections. Essentially you are a fledgling vampire. You need to truly drink from Alucard to be a full fledged Nosferatu, but that is no matter. At this moment there is no weapon other than yourself that can kill you. Just as Arucard cannot die, but remember what I said everything can die. Eventually that is. You are perfect. Becoming a true Nosferatu would not improve you in anyway."

"And the mysterious giver of Arucard' blood wouldn't happen to be you now would it."

"You're jumping to conclusions again, but the right ones. They would have eventually gotten their hands on it. It was the last piece of the puzzle. I just sped up the process."

"You know who I am, and you won't tell me. Why? What do you have to hide from me? Just tell me who am."

"I told you once, and I'll tell you again I cannot tell you that. It is not my place. There are extenuating circumstances on that."

"Just tell me who I am. That's all I want to know."

What is he hiding from me? Why won't he tell me who I am? Theirs more to all of this than meets the eye and I plan on finding out what this is.

"Girl this is your mind we're in. I can hear everything your thinking clear as day. There is no point in trying to find out things you will eventually understand. Do not fight this. You will stand to gain nothing from forcing this."

"What can I say I guess I'm just a fighter? I'm not going to stop fighting. I always fight. I'll fight until I'm free. Huh, I guess I'm not perfect I still have my individuality."

"Not for long girl not for long. It's time for you to wake up. I give you this advice girl put ice around your heart, and become hard as stone. Be the perfect little assassin for now, and when the time comes you will seize your power. Lock your humanity away. It will do you no good."

"No, don't leave me alone here. I need to know more."

Their was no answer. I could feel my self fading. I feel heavy. There are strange noises all around me, and bright light everywhere. I can't stand god damn bright light. The noises are clearer now. They're voices. People are talking. EEEWWWW... It sounds like Craig. The other one must be Dr.

"Sir, The experiment was a success. The command chip has been inserted, and is fully operational. Sir we've done it. We've made the perfect assassin."

That's all I am to these people. An experiment. I hold no value to them. I'm just another tool to be used by these sick sons of a bitch's. I will become as hard as stone, and my heart will be covered in ice. I'll make them pay for all the pain they've put me through.

"Look she's starting to come to."

"Good take her up to one of the more comfortable rooms. Give her 5 hours to get ready. Then I want her training to start. I'm sure her majesty won't want to wait to start using her new toy."

Toy! HE did not just call me a toy. I am no ones toy! Now I'm really pissed off, and I'm really, really Hungry. I can feel Craig getting closer. I can hear the blood rushing through his veins. It sounds so good, and I'm so hungry. I need Food, and he's the perfect candidate. I used all the force I could muster to spring forward, and grab him. I easily broke through the steel retainers holding me down. That's kind of impressive. Back to the man I have pinned against the wall.

"I know you know who I am, and I want you to tell me right now."

"Like I'll ever tell a freak like you."

"Well that's not nice. You know Craig I really don't like you, and unfortunately for you I'm very hungry. You know what these new fangs should get me exactly what I want to. Let's have a taste then."

I let my head drop down to his neck.

"Adrielle Stop!"

Psh, I have no intention of stopping. My eyes went wide. I can't move my head any further, it's like there's a barrier. Fuck this I'm hungry, and he's the main course. I should have taken the hint the first time. No sooner do I try and force my way through the barrier thing then I'm thrown across the room into the wall. Wow, that almost hurt. What the hell was that? Craig's words came back into my head.

_"The command chip has been inserted, and is fully operational."_

Those bastards they put a chip in me! I have to follow orders. No! They can't do this to me. How dare they think they can control me. I am 10 times their superior. Just wait I'll find a way to get this chip out of me. They'll regret the day they ever messed with me.

"Craig I think you should go before she tries to suck you dry again."

"No she almost killed me. I would have become a ghoul. I want her punished for this."

Huh, punished what does he think he can do to me.

"Craig what do you think you can do to me. Spank me. I really thought you were smarter than that, oops sorry no your not."

"I can think of something girl."

"OOO I'm so scared of you. Really I'm shaking in my bloody rags here. You see I'd normally call you old man, but I'm not quiet sure you are a man. Considering what you do in your spare time. Really now Craig Red stiletto pumps with a purple dress. I hardly think that matches. Another thing red is not your color."

"Wh… what are you talking about. How can you possibly no a thing like that,"

You should be careful what you think Craig. You never know who may be taking a peak in your brain."

"Stay out of my head girl, or else you'll regret it."

"You throw empty threats. You can't hurt me. I've already experienced the worse pain there is out their."

"THAT IS ENOUGH FROM BOTH OF YOU! I don't want to hear any more from you Craig I'm already pissed at you. I have the right of mind to let her drink you dry, but I still need you for something. Tread carefully Craig your in dark territory now. You Adrielle will go up to your new rooms. You will take a bath, make yourself look presentable, put Suitable clothes on for training, then you will go to training. Do I make myself perfectly clear to both of you!"

"Huh, yea whatever just show me were the fuck I'm going."

"I will take you there now. So follow me, and I warn you Adrielle do not make me punish you for being disobedient."

I wanted to say what the hell can you do to me, but something was telling me I shouldn't. He does after all have the power to command me with this stupid chip.

"Very well follow me."

I picked myself up from were I was sitting, and followed the good doctor out of the room. More bright white rooms. What is it with this place and white? Do they have an aversion to color? Seriously I want to know. OOO look more funny little men in white suits. I want to have some fun I'm really bored. Everything is so dull around here. The people have sticks shoved up their tight little asses or something.

"This is your rooms. Adrielle. It comes with a bathroom attached, and everything you need such as Clothes, hygenics, weapons, and forms of entertainment. I expect you to be ready in 4 hours time for training. Good day."

"Well good day to you too mister sunshine."

I smirked at him as I saw his muscles tense. I'm sure if I could see his face hi eye would be twitching. Sadly though he decided not to argue with me on my 'mister sunshine' comment. Pity I always like a good argument. Well mine as well see if my rooms as white as the rest of this place.


	3. Washing away the grime

Washing away the grime 

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing or any of its characters. For now. One day I dare to dream that they shall be mine, but alas they shall not. That doesn't mean however that I can't use them to my own cruel devises. All original characters are mine.

The door let out a spine chilling creak as I pushed it open. Quickly I snapped my eyes shut so as not to be blinded by the white light I'm sure is waiting for me. With a snap of my wrist I shut the door behind me. Yet again it creaked. The noise even creepier with my eyes shut. What is it with this place and creaking doors anyways? Have they ever heard of oil? All it takes is a quick sprits and tada no more creaking. Bloody lazy scientists.

I guess I should open my eyes. I'll never be able to get ready with my eyes shut like this, but the white is so bright. It hurts my eyes. Maybe if I slowly open my eyes it won't be as bad. You know get them to adjust to the light slowly little by little or whatever you want to call it. Come on you can do it. _Of course you can do it you're perfect remember? _Yes that's right I'm perfect so why am I acting like a big baby. _Maybe it's because you are a big baby. _HEY! I am not a baby! I'm just new to this whole actually living thing. _Baby! You're acting like a weak little child. Remember what you said you're going to put ice around your heart, and become as tough as stone. Shed your humanity and all that jazzy crap. Now would be a good time to start._ Alright, alright. No need to get all snippy about it miss. Stick up your ass girl. _You do realize you're talking about yourself right? I mean you're just talking to yourself. _Oh right forgot about that. Lived in solitary to much I guess. _You're such an idiot. _Hey! I resent that. _Just open your damn eyes, and stop stalling. _

Wow, I really should stop talking to myself. I only insult myself. Oh well what doesn't kill you makes you stronger right? Ok so on the count of three I'll slowly start to open my eyes. 1. I really hate the color white. 2. Craig looked really funny in that dress. 3. I want a pony. Reluctantly I slited my eyes just the tiniest bit.

It's a wonder my eyes didn't pop out of their eye sockets and into my hands. I'm pretty sure my jaw has just about reached the floor. Suffice to say the room is far from being white. Nope the complete opposite to be exact. It's done in a very appealing black and burgundy motif. By no means is this room as small as I thought it would be. I was thinking I was going to get a small out of the way room with a bed, and maybe a toilet or something. This room is huge! In the right side of the room there is a enormous four poster canopy bed. It looks like it's made out of mahogany. Just a few feet away is a matching armoire. It to is humongous. Placed at the foot of the bed is a you guessed it matching chest. To the left of the room there is a very big and comfortable looking couch, a plasma screen TV, DVD player, A surround sound stereo system that has my shaking in my boots already.

Well at least if I had boots on, or any type of shoes for that matter. Anyways on with the visual tour. On the far wall theirs at least 5 bookcases full of books, a comfy looking lounge chair, and what looks like a closet. What really draws your attention though is the center of the room. A beautiful yes matching table is set up in the dead center of the room with a solitary chair. The real eye catcher is the see through drapes artfully strewn about it. Giving it that exotic, sophisticated look.

Careful to not touch anything with my slimy, dirty hands I walked through the room. My feet feel like their in heaven with this wonderful carpet beneath my feet. A door a I hadn't noticed before caught my attention. This must be the adjoining bathroom. YAYA! Bathroom. With the way things are looking it should be as big as a small apartment.

"Thank the flying monkeys things are looking up!"

Ha! Flying monkeys I like that. With a little bounce in my step I rushed over to the door. A loud bang echoed through the walls of the tile bathroom as I slammed the door open. Just as I thought the bathroom is ginormus. The countertops are a beautiful ebony marble. The bathtub alone could probably fit 3 of me, and it looks like it's a Jacuzzi. The shower could be a room in itself. It can fit like 25 people. Well, ok maybe not 25 of me, but you get the point. Of course theirs the standard toilet, sink, and mirror.

With a room like this maybe being an assassin won't be that bad. I mean look at all these perks. _What are you talking about? These people command you like some pet dog, and you say that it can't be that bad because you get a nice room. Have you gone bloody mad? _Shut up inner self! I am no ones dog, and I will set myself free eventually. For now though I'm going to have my fun, and find out who the bloody hell I am. _You're such an idiot. Did you know that?_ Yea so what. I've been locked up in solitary for 7 years. Living off whatever bugs came by. I think I deserve the right to be an idiot when I'm all by lonesome self don't you think. _Whatever just so long as you don't get killed in the process, proceed in being the idiot that you truly are?_ Well now that I have you're approval.

Sigh I really have to work on not talking to myself. I should get cleaned up I suppose. Don't want to be late to my precious training. From the looks of me. It will take 3 hours for me to get even half way clean. Jumping in the shower I started the water up careful not to be hit by the steady stream. HHMM… There isn't any soap, or shampoo, or conditioner for that matter. Where to look where to look. Ah HA the cupboard under the sink should be the thief of my much needed necessities. Operation shower is under way. Adrielle moving in. Doing some rolls and tumbles I arrived kneeling in front of the cupboard. Opening the doors I found what I wanted, but the catch is there are too many choices. Their must be 100 different shampoos, and soaps. How am I supposed to choose from this vast selection?

I don't feel like going through them all right now. I'll just grab at random, and hope they smell good. Doing just that I jumped up from the floor, and tore what is left of the rags from my body. I left them on the floor as I jumped into the shower necessities in hand.

A contented sigh left my lips as I closed my eyes enjoying the warm spray of water over my naked body. My muscles started to relax, and I placed my arm against the wall resting all my weight on that. Slowly I let my head fall forward.

Watching the water going down the drain I was slightly fascinated, and disgusted. It wasn't the clear liquid that is coming from the spout above me. No, it's a very dark brown muddy liquid. _Well what did you expect? It's been 7 years since you last had a bath. At least now maybe you'll smell better. _I resent that. _It's the simple truth except it. _Why don't you shut up and leave me to my peace. _I'm just a voice in your head. You can make me go away whenever you want. You just don't want to you like my company to much. _Of course I like your company you're the only company I've got. _Case and point._

"What case what point!"

Oops didn't mean to scream that out loud. _Baby._ Bitch. _Stop talking about yourself in such a negative manner. It does nothing for your self esteem._ That's it your going bye, bye. I don't want to talk to you anymore. _Fine I'm going, but you'll miss me when I'm gone. _No I wont I'll enjoy the silence. No witty remark. Good riddance, and don't come back or I'll send the flying monkeys after you, you miserable bitch.

With a triumphant shake of my head I returned my attention back to my very much needed shower. Leaning over I grabbed the shampoo off the ground. My limbs feel so heavy, but in that good way that means I'm completely relaxed. I just decided to sit on the floor with my head out of the water spray. I gathered the enormous amount of hair I have, and threw it onto my shoulder. I squeezed a lot of shampoo into my hand. A lot more than the recommended value, but I haven't bathed in 7 years. I think it's ok to use just a tad bit more that necessary.

Lathering the soap in my hands I started to massage it through my hair. I moaned at the feeling. I haven't felt this good ever in the 7 years I can remember. A sweet smell invaded my senses. It took me a minute to realize it's the shampoo. It smells so good. For good measure. I poured some more shampoo into my hand, and continued to massage it through my hair. Once I was sure every inch of my hair is shampooed I turned back into the spray of water. I could feel my head getting lighter and lighter by the second. All the dirt and grime is washing out of my hair and it feels amazing. Muddy water is cascading down my shoulders, around my breasts, and down past my legs. With each stream a little more tension left my body.

Next is the conditioner. This part is rather difficult. I have 7 years worth of knots and tangles. It is rather difficult to get the conditioner every where it needs to go, but I managed. Eventually I got it through the entire length of my hair. Now I wait a minute just like the instructions on the nice box says.

With a sigh I started lathering the body soap into the loufa. Mine as well get it ready while I wait for the amazing conditioner to do its untangling powers. I squeezed more than half the bottle onto the loufa, and the other half all over my body. Using my hands first I started to rub the sweet smelling soap into my skin. It feels good. The soap has tiny little beads in it that caress my skin in a most pleasant manner. I can't reach all of my back that well I guess that's what the loufa with the handle is for.

First I need to get my front done. I rubbed the soap into my stomach thoroughly. I moved my hands up to my breasts. I paid close attention to getting it on the under side and everywhere in general. Once I was sure that they were cleaned I let my hands go further up my body to my shoulder. I gave myself a massage as I rubbed the soap in. It just feels so good to get clean. Grabbing the loufa I started on my back. I made sure to apply added pressure to get all the soap on my back, and to get a more thorough clean. Damn I have to stand up. Using the floor as leverage I pulled my self up from the wet floor. Using the loufa I soaped up my legs, but, and the junction between my legs.

It's been more than a minute now, and I'm all soapy time to get all wet again. Quickly I took a step back into the now hotter spray of water. It almost felt scalding, but pain has a whole new meaning to me.

My mood went from joyfully relaxed to Dark, and sinister. How dare they do that to me. Didn't they know how much that hurt? Couldn't they tell that I couldn't take anymore? Those stupid fucking bastards I'll kill them all. I'll make them all pay for what they did to me. I used my fists to vent my anger. I punched the wall over and over again. My knuckles were broken by the time I stopped, and I put a very large dent in the tiled wall. It cracked almost all the way up to the ceiling.

Ok so maybe I over did it a little bit, but I'm pissed. Oh well better to just finish up this shower than get everything else done. I stepped out of the shower after I made sure I didn't have anymore soap still clinging to me anywhere. I stepped out of the shower dripping wet without a towel or anything. Oh well. Not like I care.

I Stopped in front of the mirror. This is the first time I've actually seen what I really look like in 7 years. To my surprise I don't look that bad. From the looks of it I would guess I'm about 5'3'', my hair is really long down to my knees. I'll have to find a pair of succors or something sharp to cut it later. My skin is pale, but not to pale. I haven't seen sunlight in years so that is to be expected. My Hips are shapely but not to shapely. My thighs defined, but not flabby. My breast are noticeable, but not that unbearably huge. I'd have to guess around a B cup. My face is pretty, smooth, and fair. My eyes really pop out though. They are an emerald green, but instead of the usual black rimming I have a blood red one. My hair is a deep shade of brown with some blonde and lighter brown streaks through it. I can tell that when it dries it will be as straight as it is now when it's wet.

Hell I would go as far as to say that I look beautiful. Interesting. Turning away from the Mirror I walked over to the sink. Good I don't have to look for the toothbrush or the tooth paste. It's right their on the counter. OO it's an electric toothbrush perfect. I'll need the extra power for my teeth. Grabbing it off the counter I loaded it with lots of tooth paste. I ran it under the water to get it moist. I then proceeded to brush my teeth twice in a row. With a sigh I put the toothbrush back down on the table. And looked back up into the mirror on the wall over the sink.

This is going to be a long day"

_Well don't you know it you lazy ass._ Not you again. _Hey you need me. Without me you would be nothing, but a pathetic ball of sniveling cowardice. _Shut the fuck up and leave me alone. I don't need you, and I sure as hell don't need anyone else. So go away, and don't come back. _You seem to be forgetting that I am you. We're not 2 separate people. If you want me to go away you have stop bringing me back. So shut up and deal you bring this upon yourself. _

Without another word being said I smashed the mirror with my fist. I swear I saw my eyes changing color.

"AAAAAHHHH! Why me. Just leave me alone. Everyone. Just let me be free."

With that said I stormed out of the bathroom to get dressed, and go take my anger out at training.

**Authors note: I'm really sorry this chapter is so bad but it is a transition chapter, and they always stink. I promise the next chapter will be better. So stay tuned for Training Day.**


	4. Authors Note

Authors note:

Hey I know everybody hates author's notes and this is not the next two chapters like I had planned on doing. I want to apologize for the wait, but I had the two chapters typed up and ready to post but my computer has screwed it up and both chapters were lost. I'm sorry but I have to rewrite the chapters. I promise to write as fast as possible.


	5. Chapter 5

Training Day

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing or any of its characters. All original characters are mine.

Sorry for the wait everyone. This was a difficult chapter. This starts out pretty slow, but I promise it will be better once it gets started.

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The cool air of the room caused goose bumps to rise on my naked flesh. Shivering I quickened my pace towards the Armoire.

"_Why, why didn't I just grab the towel, and why is it so bloody cold in this room!"_

"_Well maybe it's so cold, because it's the middle of winter outside."_

"_How would you know it's the middle of winter out side?"_

I got the distinct impression the voice in myhead just rolled itseyes at me.

"_You really aren't observant are you? Look out the window you dolt."_

I grudgingly did as she was told and resented herself for it. Not to my surprise the rather insulting voice in my head was right. Like usual. I sighed, and continued my fast pace over to the Armoire.

"_Smart ass."_

"_Really Adrielle I'm a voice in your head. Insulting me is insulting your self. When will you understand this?" _

"_When you start acting like a voice in my head, Instead of some intruder in my mind."_

"_Clever girl, really you are. I truly have underestimated you."_

"_And you are to be exact."_

I stopped in front of the armoire waiting for a reply. Looking down I noticed three drawers. Dropping to my knees I opened the first one. Picking out a black Bra and Panties set. Closing that drawer I opened the second drawer. From here I picked a pair of black baggy sweat pants.

"_I'm waiting."_

_God, how long does it take to answer a simple question?_

Opening the third drawer I rummaged around and finally decided on a nice white wife beater.

_"God come on I want an answer!"_

_"You'll know soon enough."_

The calm easy coolness of his voice angered me in a way I couldn't explain if asked to, and I wanted an answer, and that wasn't an answer.

_"That is not an answer and you know it. Give me a real answer! Oh stop using my voice to it's getting confusing!"_

_"Answers are fickle things my dear. You are not yet ready for the answers that come with the question you asked."_

For the moment I had no reply. All that I could do was stare with strange intense eyes at nothing. The once familiar voice that was mine had changed into a deep, seductive, very masculine one. It seemed to caress every part of me wrapping me in its forbidden spell. Then with a shake of my head the moment was gone, and my anger returned.

_"Ready or not I want answers now! If you don't give me answers so help me I will find you and rip you apart piece by piece until you tell me."_

A gasp escaped my lips as I felt the undeniable pressure of a hand caressing my face.

_"You're truly beautiful when you're angry. Did you know that?"_

_"How would you know? You've never even seen my face before."_

_"My dear you are mistaken I can see you right now. I must say for all the energy this is using it is well worth it."_

I opened my mouth to give him a rude reply, but my eyes widened when my words were halted by the unmistakable feeling of his lips aggressively pressed against mine in a demanding, hot kiss. My traitorous eyes slid closed as a breathy moan escaped my lips, and my arms joined the traitorous behavior as they wrapped around his neck. My hand brushed silky long hair and it immediately fisted itself in it with a pull I brought his body closer to mine as I started to kiss him back.

_What am I doing! I don't even know his name._

All thoughts of protesting, and pushing the strange man away from her flew away as his warm wet tongue slid across my lips, demanding entrance. I found myself all to willing to obey, and before I knew it we were exploring the deep recesses of each other's mouths. Running my tongue over his teeth I winced as they were cut.

_He has fangs. Just as I thought he's a vampire with a real skill for kissing._

My tongue started to bleed, and he immediately sucked it into his mouth drawing as much blood from the wound as he could. Normally this would disgust someone, but it only proved to make the desire in the pit of my stomach increase tenfold.

A deep moan almost a growl of protest escaped my throat as he tore away from out bloody kiss. I could here his smirk as he chuckled. I kept my eyes closed and leaned forward unconsciously seeking his lips again. I was granted a quick peck before he leaned in close to my ear.

"As much as I would love to continue this my dear I have used too much energy, and must depart for awhile. Don't worry I'll come to you again."

He nuzzled my neck affectionately, and just as I opened my eyes he was gone leaving me no time to see if I could see him or just feel him. Raising a shaking hand to my bruised and swollen lips I shook my head a little bit. Then I was angry again.

_Why that pompous,_ _conceited,_ _incorrigible, bastard. How dare he kiss me like that? Like he owned me or we were lovers. Hell I don't even know his name. I'll rip him to shreds the next time I see that bastard. He's dead._

Looking down I noticed to my horror that I was still butt naked. I tried to fight the blush that seemed to creep up my entire body, but I lost, and I seemed to turn scarlet in color. In hurried motions I pulled my chosen clothes on. I gasped at the pain in my scalp as my overly long hair got caught in a zipper, and was yanked out.

_I have to do something about this unnatural growth of hair on my head._

With calm controlled steps I walked back into the bathroom and in front of the shattered mirror. I starred at my many reflections staring at me. Smirking I reached down into my shoe and took the dagger I had placed there out. I was so happy when I managed to pocket this off Craig during that little fight earlier.

Gathering my floor length hair at the base of my back I brought the blade up to the edge of the hair. In one quick deft stroke the hair was cut, and I watched as the decapitated strands floated to the floor. With a few more cuts my hair rested just below my shoulder blades in straight glossy lairs, and a set of bangs framed my face.

With a sigh I placed the dagger securely back in place in my shoe. Looking back at the many faces of me I stared critically at my appearance.

_My hair color I don't like it. It needs to be darker like me. Question is what to do with it and how? Hhhmmm… I know I'll make the base color emerald green. A deep dark emerald green oh and black highlights. Yes, that is defiantly what I want, but how to do it._

I closed my eyes in deep thought tilting my head back ever so slightly. A flashback suddenly came to me.

Flashback

"_Hold her down will you. Strap her in. NO! For gods sake don't let her get up." _

_Voices were everywhere buzzing in my disoriented head as I tried to get away. I didn't want to hurt anymore, and it hurt so badly. I growled animalisticly as I was forcefully strapped down to the cold, cold table. My eyes caught hold of the bag of new blood just waiting to be pumped into my awaiting veins. _

_The label read 'Chameleon camouflage.' _

End flashback

My fists clenched painfully at the vivid memories. My finger nails leaving crescent moons in the palms of my hands. Taking a few deep breaths I relaxed my fists and smirked.

_So I can physically change my appearance. Maybe it's triggered by visualization._

With my eyes still closed I focused hard on only a picture of myself as I am now. Tuning out everything else I visualized my hair changing from its brownish color into its deep emerald green one, and the black highlights framing my face, and scattered throughout my hair. Once I felt I had done the best I could I opened my eyes slowly.

Slowly didn't last long as they flew open. It had worked. Reaching up I ran my hand through it marveling as the dark emerald shone in the light. My black bangs giving me the perfect look.

_I didn't actually expect that to work. This is pretty cool._

With a slightly cheerful smirk on my face I grabbed a hair tie from a basket full of them on the sink counter. Walking out of the room I loosely put my new lovely hair up in a high ponytail. Practically falling down onto the couch I rested my eyes. I quickly fell into a half sleep half waking state. Time seemed to have no meaning as the world moved on around me.

What seemed like a bomb exploding next to my ear startled me into sitting straight up, my hand on the dagger ready to strike. As my mind came out of the half sleep daze I realized that it was someone knocking that had startled me so. It seemed the longer I sat there on the couch the louder and harder the knocks got.

_Jesus they are going to knock the bloody door of its hinges. Gee I wonder who that could be then. I only know one man out of everybody here as impatient as Craig, and this sounds exactly like Craig. _

The door started to violently shake as I got up off the couch.

"Hold your bloody horses I'm coming!"

My loud exclamation seemed to have the reverse effect of what I wanted, and the door only shook more. I quickly grabbed the handle and wrenched open the door. I stood there with a raised eyebrow at the still mid knock Craig. Tapping my foot impatiently I looked at him with annoyance written plainly across my face.

"Well you blubbering waste of breath is there something you wanted."

I got a very pig like sounding grunt in response. Then he turned around starting to walk away. He got two steps before he turned around.

"Hurry up! I'm supposed to be taking you down to the trainers."

Rolling my eyes I closed the door behind me.

"Well you know you could have simply said that in the first place instead of being the pathetic asshole that you are."

He turned around to face me anger practically beaming towards me in little death rays from his eyes.

"Don't. Speak. To. Me. Like. That."

Each word was accentuated with a snap and snarl of his mouth meant to intimidate me, but I was hardly phased by him.

"What are you going to do about it Craig shoot me with a holly bullet. I'm so scared."

"Just you wait one day girl we wont need you anymore then you'll just be another outdated experiment in the trash heap."

"I await the day I'm free from you."

He was starting to turn a bright red around the ears in what I could only assume was anger.

"Whatever just move."

Slowly I followed him as he headed down sets and sets of what seemed to be endless halls of white. I didn't notice that I had started to fall behind Craig until he was right up in my face shouting at me for being to slow. I just rolled my eyes at him again and pushed passed him continuing to walk blindly down the numerous hallways.

Craig rushed passed me back into the spot of leader. A tense silence settled over the two of us. Each waiting for a chance to bait the other into another fight. Then he suddenly stopped in front of a door labeled 23rd training area.

"Alright this is the place. Get in there."

He stalked off not a second later disappearing behind the corner that led to probably yet another hallway. I stood there looking at that door for what felt like an eternity before my hand came up slowly of its own accord to grasp the cold handle on the door. With a determined nod of my head I pushed it open and stepped into the grey training room. I was glad that it didn't follow the trend, and wasn't painted white.

Looking around I noticed a total of maybe 20 people were training in this oversized dojo. My hand shot out grabbing the hand of another who was reaching out to tap me on the shoulder. Looking over to the owner of the hand I came face to face with a smirking woman.

"Well at least your not completely raw. I can work with you. My names Cara I'll be your trainer until you know everything I know."

"Adrielle, and I don't like being touched."

The one known as Cara removed her hand from my grip with a nod of her head in acknowledgement of what I had said.

"Fair enough I suppose."

"So tell me what are my plans for the day."

Cara's face grew serious and critical as she looked at me. She started to circle me like a hawk would its prey.

"I think we'll start you off on the basics, and work you up over the course of the week to the more advanced stuff. Lets do shuriken throwing first. Please follow me."

Doing as I was told I followed her into a separate room. On one side there was a wooden dummy separated by a divider. Cara walked up to one of the stalls attached to the divider. With a motion of her hand she motioned me to follow her. Obeying the silent command I awaited instruction.

"Listen closely Adrielle this is how you throw a shuriken…"

An hour later, and I still couldn't throw the damn thing into the wooden dummies neck. I had hit everywhere else possible to hit on the cutup things body except for its damn neck. Closing my eyes I rested against the wall feeling my frustration beginning to boil.

_Deep calming breathes. Just relax and focus. All you have to do is focus like you did the chameleon thing._  
Straightening up I opened my eyes againstaring at me still rival. I let my eyes focus on the neck of the wooden dummy and only the neck of the dummy. My vision centered on the wooden dummy everything else becoming non-existent. Holding the shuriken perfectly I brought it back then threw it with practiced perfection. My eyes watched in amazement as it sank deep into the dummy's neck. Smirking I strode out of the little stall searching for Cara.

I found her just outside the little room. Walking up to her I tapped her lightly on the shoulder. Where she turned around I made the announcement.

"I did it. I managed to get it in the neck."

She looked surprised for a moment before heading into the little throwing room obviously to examine my work. She nodded in approval of the throw, and turned back to me with a smirk of her own.

"I think we shall move onto hand to hand combat…"

I couldn't suppress the disgruntled moan that escaped my lips.

_This is going to be a long day._


End file.
